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share your experience related to this article? How to avoid the Social
first comments will be added to this article. Submision closed March 21,
21, 2003, Ashley Lithoe, ...
there. I am Betty Newbie, and this is my husband, Bob, and our
Brenda. However, we are sure that you are quite familiar with us,
after that parenting "fiasco."
have come to complain about the way Social Services work around here.
one year before Brenda was born, we had a son. Since both of us held
our plan was for one of us to stay home while the other one worked.
placed the baby cradle in the main room, and went to sleep in our
Here is your first blunder: Bob and I are both heavy sleepers, so
should have told us before to move the cradle to the bedroom! We
that fact only after you took our baby boy away. Thus, because
sleepiness, we could not respond to the baby on time. Here is your
blunder: you should have put that warning in a language that common
like us would understand! We were so confused with the legalese,
we had no choice but to toss it into the can with the rest of the
Here is your final mistake: you did not even TRY to ring the
like all the other social workers do outside of SimCity. We may
have been good parents, but even bad parents do not deserve such
the day that we had Brenda, both of us had skipped work. Bob had
taken the day off to care for the boy, while I missed my carpool.
Thus, when Brenda came, one of us had to lose his or her job to take care
of her, and Bob volunteered. Throughout those days, we had improved
enough to successfully raise Brenda to be the good child that she is.
However, although we have improved, Social Services definitely has not.
I remember talking to a friend, John Walker, and he had complained to me
about your warnings. In case you haven't noticed, in the Walkers'
house, John is the primary caregiver for all of the children, since his
wife, Sarah, goes to work, and he is unemployed. Whencaring for Daniel,
he got tired, hungry and cranky! His wife and kids could not help
that much, since they all must leave the house at some time (Sarah to work,
the kids to school), and, when you gave that warning, everyone slept in
a single room! The baby's crying was bound to wake up the adults,
thus leaving poor John with no energy left to care for the baby.
you have to go easy on us parents. Although the children are what
keeps us alive, we are only human. We do our best to raise our children
the right way, but sometimes, we fail. We do not throw parties and
we are willing to lose our jobs to care for the baby. So please forgive
us when we become too tired or cranky to respond to our children on time!
21, 2003, Ashley Lithoe, ...
Mrs Swims, I have lost many a children at home it is just so horrible I
would just like to say I am going to try everthing posible to stop the
21, 2003, Ashley Lithoe, ...
a doctor an expert on family life and family planning. Some people don't
plan for a family which means that they need to work to support the family.
Some sims just need the money and that boosts up the chances of losing
your baby. I think it is up to the SS to do their job but also help in
stooping this happening again by providing services for future mums and
dads some training and some support for mums in crisis. We tax payers pay
for you to help, so please do your job! Give parents time but still do
your job. Taking a child should be a last resort.
21, 2003, Jazmyne Walker, ...
have lost 12 babies to the Ss lady. Me and my husband have work at the
same jobs but we get home late.We live in a apartment. How do I hire and
nanny? How do I get someone to watch my sweet little girl?
21, 2003, mrs Courtney Simmit, ...
Ursull, one night i was fast asleep on the sofa because i could not reach
my bed i for got all about my baby. As i was asleep i could not hear my
baby upstairs the next thing i no the social worker was there and took
my baby away my husband and i were destroyed. From then on we just don't
seem to be able to have another child so have you any ways to get a new
21, 2003, Skye McGarther, ...
I found a non-perfect yet still affective way to keep your baby. It may
sound horrid but it works. A single mother and her child. She built a mote
around her house and made counters all around the crib. When she went off
to work the social workers didnt come. She would come back and take care
of her child. Oh did I mention she also made her house float? The social
workers never came. And her child developed into a beautiful younge lady.
21, 2003, ~Emily~, ...
have lost my babies so many times! It is very upsetting each and every
time. Why can't we hire nannys? SS needs to be a better company!
21, 2003, CSta2003, ...
hate it when the social worker takes your baby away, is there a way to
21, 2003, Csugarbabes, ...
agree with the story and i think their should be nannys to look after the
21, 2003, bgbrown, ...
got so upset with ss that I killed the Sw when they came to take my baby
21, 2003, June, ...
the baby where ever you go!
21, 2003, SimFreakCW, ...
absolutely love your columns! I found the best way to keep a baby away
from social workers is to have one sim as the 'stay at home' sim and make
them quit their job. Then, make a baby's room, or use a room where no one
sleeps. Then, buy a simple cot and put it in that room and have that sim
sleep there until the baby's grown! it's a way to keep other sims sleep
and not lose the baby!
21, 2003, ..., ...
My husband and I just adopted a baby girl, Rosealie, because we can't have
children absolutely love kids but am so afraid of losing them to social
services. I just wish there was a book or a magazine to ensure the quality
of mothers and the baby at that. And also I wish there was a baby-sitter
or nanny you could hire when you needed them. That way you just have a
night to yourself. Now I have a question. What are the chances of someone
having twins or adopting twins?
21, 2003, Lindziebabie, ...
i am so mad when the social worker comes i like cry. once the baby had
a few more hours but she had to come. my woman can never find guys but
whenever she does he is never in the mood for a baby it makes me so mad
so i dump the guy. i make a room for the baby so it will think i have room
in the house. i act really responsible so it will maybe let me adopt a
baby but no i'm stuck with nothing.
27, 2002, Monica Simolean, ...
name is Nicolette Althaus and my husband and I have three gorgeous daughters,
Jacqueline 9, Danielle 6, and Celine 3. Before our first daughter, Claude
and I had a baby boy, Jack. We were inexperienced parents and were
unsure of how to raise our baby. Jack had a lovely nursery down the
hall that had a friendly clown theme. One night, we went to sleep
and before we knew it the SS lady had come and snatched our son away.
When Jacqueline came along, we learned that keeping her bassinet in our
room while we slept was a great way to be sure that we never slept through
her crying. As soon as she cried, we both woke up and we haven't lost a
27, 2002, Monica Simolean, ...
my name is Monica Simolean and I have had 2 babies taken away. It
is very hard to watch a baby and get all our needs fulfilled at the same
time. My partner and I both work the same job at the same hours.
We have had one daughter but found that her needs were too costly for us,
so we gave her away. We have since been asked and given many opportunities
to either adopt or have a baby naturally, but we said no. We are
happy in love by ourselves and refuse to be humilated again by a social
27, 2002, Jeff, ...
am yet to lose my child to social services but i fear i will. How do i
hire a nanny for my baby?
27, 2002, Hottgurl, ...
was taking good care of my baby when i went to sleep after being exausted
as a single mother i went to sleep i tried to wake up but couldn't fast
enoughto get to the baby so i locked me and my baby into a room so the
social worker couldn't get in somehow she got in anyways and tok my baby
but couldn't get out because there was no doorway so then 5 hours later
28, 2002, David Cooper, Mayfeild Sims
wife, Erin, and I adopted twin boys after we married. She became a stay
at home mom and my daughter, Sam, stayed out of school for a couple days
to help her, as did I. We got through that, although it was hard,
then we had a daughter, Emma, two years later. Sam had moved out,
so it was just Erin to look after the baby and twins, who were too young
to help out, while I was at work. We were doing good, untill the
day before the baby grew up. Erin and I were torn apart, if only
Social Services gave us more time!
12, 2002, M. Holley, ...
may have the solution to your SS problems! While looking for sim sites
I found information on an amazing 24/7 nanny, this service can be ordered
at the site cheapfrills.com. Not only do you not have to take care of him/her,
you can decide when you want it to grow up!
I have hired the nanny myself and I assure you she is very helpful to you
8, 2002, Marissa Sims, ...
had just moved into my new home with my husband and daughter and I had
to make my daughter stay home from school alot of times just so child services
would not take my child away from me like they had did two years ago.
11, 2002, Andrew Beartop, Simmerville
partner and I adopted a baby 8 months ago, and the social worker came to
take our baby away. What happened is that we went to sleep, not being aware
that time litterally is flying when you are asleep, so when the baby started
crying in the middle of the night, it took us almost 1 hour before we noticed.
We have adopted 2 more babies after that, and it worked out fine.
9, 2002, Cassie Moulino, Simmerville
never saw a social worker, even if we have 6 kids. But both of us work
at home, and for each new kid there is one more baby-sitter. We even kept
our oldest daughter home from school one day to look after her baby brother.
your baby to Social Services
9, 2002 - by Ursull S. Swims, Specialist
Have you ever been in
the horrible situation of losing your dear baby to a Social Worker? October
4th I attended a meeting where the Social Services' charter and the parents'
responsibility were discussed. And I couldn't believe my ears!
Services is taking away babies from busy and frustrated parents. This has
been a parent's worst fear ever since Social Services got their current
charter from SimCity Social Department back in January 2000. Many parents
and neighbourhoods have protested, but nothing seems to help. So, I was
quite happy when Simmerville Web arranged for a meeting between one representative
from Social Services, one unhappy parent, and myself as the baby Specialist.
Weeks in advance of this meeting Sims all over SimCity were invited to
mail me relevant questions to be raised at that meeting.
The parents' representative
(chosen on random) was the single parent Ms Samanthy Gloss, resenting the
Moonstruck Neighbourhood, and who has lost a total of 5 babies to the social
workers. Ms Gloss currently has no children at home. We had an appointment
with Social Services' consultant Charlotta Ruanda, who's main field is
children and old people, health and happiness in general.
Ms Gloss and I arrived Social
Services main office downtown, and found Mrs Ruanda in her office.
Mrs Swims (Specialist):
Mrs Ruanda, did you know that every single day in SimCity more than 500
babies are taken away by social workers?
Mrs Ruanda (SS):
Oh, that is a high number, I didn't know we did such a great job, although
I know our workers are very busy, they work day and night, and they hardly
get any rest at all. Removing babies from the homes is not a fun thing
to do, so we really owe them our respect.
Well, this is not how the parents look at it! I've got so many mail before
this meeting, from parents all over SimCity, crying of frustration, they
can't even go to use the toilet before your workers arrives and remove
their baby. I like to read you a mail I received from Mrs.Rodriguez of
I think this letter pretty much
describes the problem, Mrs Ruanda, today's routine is too hard on the parents!
500 babies daily! Shouldn't the goal rather be zero babies daily?
Hello my name is Mrs.Rodriguez and I am the spokeswoman
of Sim City Heights!
My concern is this: Sim City Social Services are ruining
the life of my town members and those of neighbouring communities. Sometimes
a sim must wake up and take longer, sometimes a sim is in the shower or
is sick. So how can we get to the babies fast enough!?!? WE as a Sim People
need to confront these S.Service workers and tell them its not always our
fault! I mean when we have the child and if we are single we have to quit
our job! Then how do we feed em? They should have a nanny or give us a
leave at work! Sim City Services really needs to figure out these glitches!
Ruanda: You forget to think of all those couples who can not have
a baby in the natural way, who are waiting for adoption. Every baby that
is removed from it's parents will get a new and hopefully better home.
But how about spending some time on training the parents to look after
their baby? One parent wrote me suggesting a baby care training centre,
where fresh parents can learn how to look after their baby. Wouldn't that
be a better investment than to pay hundreds of social workers?
Well, any community has a certain need of replacement of babies... anything
else would be a problem because of our deal with... uhm... well... Ohh!
Isn't it a lovely day? Sunny, and everything! Well, nobody knows what the
future brings, perhaps there will be a training centre where parents can
take classes to be prepared for their baby. Or we could even republish
Mr Heinstein's book "How to take care of your baby", or even better; I
could write a new book! That's not a bad idea, not at all...
That brings us onto another subject, the humiliation when a baby is taken
away! I invited Ms Samanthy Gloss to join us in this meeting, I sent you
her record in advance.
Yes, welcome. I must say it's nicer to see you, Ms Gloss, than it was to
see your record with the social workers...
Ms Samanthy Gloss (ex-parent):
Mrs Swims is right about the humiliation. I have neighbours in Moonstruck,
and they all know that I had 5 babies in a row, and that they all were
taken away from me. I love babies, and I spent most of my time watching
and caring for them, but that is not easy when your social worker is standing
in my garden, peeking in through my window waiting for me to sit down for
15 minutes in the room next door. The next thing I knew was this woman
leaving the house with my baby! I did nothing wrong, Mrs Ruanda!
That was her job, Ms Gloss... And don't you forget to mention the reasons
why your babies were taken away? The very first one you left alone at home
while you went to work as usual. When you returned to your home we had
already removed your baby.
Ms Samanthy Gloss:
That is correct, and I realize it was wrong of me to keep my job after
having a baby, but I was a single parent, and I needed the income to support
both of us. The house needed an extra room within 3 days, and I didn't
want my kid to sleep on the floor either!
Mrs Swims: That s
a well known experience, Ms Gloss. Most fresh parents think they can work
while they have a baby. Well, it might work out if you work for only 4-5
hours, but it's hard to make that fit with the baby's sleeping routine.
If you are 2 parents though, each of you could take every other day off
from work. None of you would get fired, there would always be someone to
look after the baby, and as soon as the child starts School, both of you
would be back at work daily. It's harder being a single parent. Well, Mrs
Ruanda, what about Ms Gloss' second baby?
Then Ms Gloss was busy giving a party in her home! You should not focus
on partying while having a baby to look after, Ms Gloss. When our worker,
Sylvia, arrived, nobody heard the door bell, or the screaming baby. The
music was so loud you didn't even hear our worker slamming the front door
when she left, or when she called you 10 minutes later. I'm quite sure
your baby is in a much better home now.
Ms Samanthy Gloss:
That is a terrible thing to say, Mrs Ruanda! I was exhausted from caring
for my baby, but I was so lonely, I needed to invite someone over. I didn't
know they brought a whole party, and that they wanted to dance and have
fun instead of just making me feel less lonely. Have you ever tried to
break up a party, Mrs Ruanda? Well, I guess you must have...
Mrs Swims: [Shh, Ms
Gloss] Well, it is a lot harder to bring up a child when you are alone.
It takes so much of your time, and it can't give back as much as it takes,
meaning you need to find other ways to socialize and have fun. Having a
pet would be a good idea, but you could also just talk with friends on
the phone, instead of inviting them over. If your neighbourhood has got
the modern telephone system, that is. When it comes to fun, there are many
ways of having fun which is way less exhausting than to host a party. Such
as reading a good book while you sit in a comfortable chair, to play a
computer game or virtual reality set. Or you could even play with the baby
to avoid getting totally bored during the baby watches.
Ms Samanthy Gloss:
Oh, I never really thought of that. I don't read a lot, so I never thought
it can be fun. Well, I must have made a fool of myself for the first 2
babies, but when the 3rd baby was born, it was a problem from the start
because I was on 2nd story ironing when I gave birth, meaning I had to
keep the baby upstairs for 3 days, while I needed to go downstairs in order
to use the bathroom and to cook. It was really hard on me, and almost impossible
to be in control of the situation.
That is a clever observation, Ms Gloss, when giving birth it would be smart
to stay on ground level.
I couldn't agree more. That would also make it easier for our social workers
to spy on the baby and to get access to it's cradle, uhm... it sure is
a nice day, let's go on with more questions... nice day, indeed...
Samanthy Gloss: And the 4th time, the dishwasher broke, and I called
the repairman, who blocked my entrance to the nursery until the social
worker appeared. It wasn't fair, I tried to tear down the wall into the
nursery, but I'm not that strong. I needed the doorway.
Ordering a repairman is a dangerous thing to do when you have a baby needing
your attention, because with some bad luck they will send you a deaf repairman
who you can't ask to move at all. Even having a running deal with a maid
or a gardener is risky with a baby in the house, when they are around you
should at least make sure to sit in the nursery, avoiding them blocking
Excuse me, how could you afford a gardener, a maid and a repairman, and
not having enough money to stay home with your baby? Do you prefer a beautiful
garden and a dishwasher instead of a healthy kid? Please answer me, Ms
Ms Samanthy Gloss:
You are mixing the cards, Mrs Ruanda. I never hired a maid or a gardener,
and I did not have the dish washer back when I couldn't afford to quit
Swims: [So so, Ms Gloss...] Well, Ms Gloss, it seems to me like
what you need in order to success is some knowledge on how to learn the
baby's sleeping rhythm. If you make notes during the first day, you will
know approximately what times it will wake up. In between you will have
5-6 hours on your own. The baby will normally wake up for feeding every
8 hours, but if you feed it very much or play and sing a lot you can extend
the upcoming break. If it falls asleep after only one bottle of milk and
one song, it might wake up earlier than 8 hours. Note it is about 8 hours
between the start of two following baby watches, if you spend 3 hours
on feeding it and singing, there will be 5 hours left for the break, not
Ms Samanthy Gloss:
Oh, that sounds very complicated. Wouldn't it be easier if the social worker
gave me a call before she comes to fetch my baby? Or allowing the baby
to scream for 1 more hour?
Sorry, Ms Gloss, that is not possible. No baby should be left for 2 hours
screaming! What mother would that be?
But could Social Services work on their charter? Making it just a little
easier for parents to bring up their babies? Like being less restrictive
on every household's first born baby, then the parents would learn how
to raise a baby, and your workers could expect less crying for any later
babies. How about that, Mrs Ruanda?
ABSOLUTELY NOT! It's our charter to bring in babies if their parents do
not care for them in a satisfying way. SimCity has got too many nasty and
ruined kids already, do you want them all to be sent away to Military School?
Or the teens to join the mobs? That is what would happen if it wasn't for
us! There's even an additional not so public chapter in our charter, trying
to keep the number of SimCity kids to a minimum, and if you think it is
easy... oops, arg... what a nice day, who would expect sunshine again?
... I think our time is out, Mrs Swims and Ms Gloss, this meeting is closed,
... and what a nice day!